Ask The Therapist
Q&A for Curious Teens who want to Improve their Mental Health.
Teens face many stressors and feel big emotions. This is a space where you can ask questions about mental health, coping skills, social dilemmas, or relationship issues without judgment, privately and safely.
Every week, I will post my answers to all the questions I get that week.
October 1st, 2026
The Question:
How do I talk about my feelings and my problems without people getting mad, upset, or scared?
The Therapist’s Answer:
- You can and will feel better! This is not permanent.
Teen years are generally a tough time. You’re experiencing changes in your hormones, which can affect mood. You are also losing your childhood innocence and trying to figure out who you are as a person. This will not last forever — you will get comfortable with yourself and you will learn a lot as you grow. - Ask for what you need.
Adults in your life care about you and want to help. But sometimes they do what they think is best instead of trying to figure out what you want. Think about how you want them to react. Do you want someone to listen and understand? Do you want guidance on what to do? Do you want help to get out of a bad situation (like if you’re being physically, sexually, or emotionally abused)? Or are you not sure? Whatever it is, tell them. You are the one who knows best what you need because you’re the one feeling the pain. - Which adult in your life is easiest to talk to?
Choose someone who makes you feel safe, and who will listen to what you ask for. That can be a parent, a family member, a teacher, or a school counselor. - Safety is the most important thing.
If you are having thoughts of hurting yourself, it is important to get help. Depression and anxiety cloud your thinking, and you don’t want to make decisions that harm your health or your life when your thinking is clouded. (Suicide hotline # is 988.) - Don’t suffer in silence!
People might get upset if you mention you’re self-harming or you’re suicidal. It’s very scary for the people who love you to know that your physical wellbeing is in danger. That doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. You don’t have to take responsibility for their feelings. Let them use their own coping skills to deal. Just stay focused on getting what you need and talk to the person who is most helpful.
September 21st, 2026
The Question:
This is the first entry, before any questions come in. To get us started, I will share some facts about feelings that you might find helpful.
The Therapist’s Answer:
Here are 4 things to know about feelings ~
- Feelings are triggered by change — big or small. This means that changes in our environment, relationships, or activities can trigger different feelings.
- Feelings don’t just disappear. If you ignore your feelings, all you are doing is closing the door to a part of yourself. Sometimes that might be necessary so that you can cope, but in the long term, bottled up feelings can become overwhelming.
- Feelings can be deceiving. Sometimes it’s hard to tell what you’re really feeling. For example, anger can present as sadness, or sadness as anger. Or sometimes anxiety can present as boredom. It is important to get to know your feelings.
- Feelings can change. Sometimes our feelings are really big and we can’t see outside of them. Painful feelings are especially powerful, and sometimes it might seem like they will never end. But all feelings have starting and stopping points.
Disclaimer: This column is for educational and supportive purposes and does not replace individual, professional medical advice or therapy. If you are experiencing a mental health emergency or feeling unsafe, please text or call 988 immediately (US/Canada) to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. It is free, confidential, and available 24/7. If you would like to message me (Liliana) directly, you can send me an email at lilianaspractice@gmail.com. It is a private email address and I am the only one who reads it.